How can you be yourself? And just who is that?
Quite a lot of my writing is an attempt to answer my own questions! I have a lot of them. Questions seem to come to me naturally, perhaps that’s why I’m a Coach.
I have the big questions that everyone has at some point in their lives. I’m interested in exploring the depths of life. So, for me, these questions have been a bit of a constant companion:
Who am I?
Why am I here?
What am I here to contribute?
How can I be all I can be?
I am writing this because I’m interested in what move us forward on the path to what it takes to become fully ourselves, reach our potential, and shed what keeps us limited.
I’m obsessed with these questions.
The answers I get have changed over time. I’m fine with that! I have learnt that often answers to these big questions get revealed over time. As in an enthralling movie, knowing how it ends would be a bit of a spoiler, and stop us from enjoying the ride!
I no longer see myself with a fixed identity, since I’ve seen the person who I’ve believed myself to be, change over time, so I can’t completely buy into the identity I currently have.
Perhaps something in me knows that any answer is temporary and there will be more to discover as I go deeper. We find that there is so much more to us than first meets the eye, a little like how science has seen more and more as it has probed under the surface. Why wouldn’t it be the same with who we are?
Divine Self
I believe the everyday self we consider ourselves to be, is merely the surface of a much bigger identity. We could use the word God, or Divinity for all of Existence, which has its innate goodness, beauty and wisdom. And since we are undeniably part of this much greater whole, this oneness implies that we too are intrinsically Divine.
So, the big questions I posed earlier could be put another way…
What is my Divine Essence?
What is my Divine Expression?
If we fathomed these answers, we would be living a truly miraculous life, a life in harmony and Flow with our Divinity.
I believe we can fulfil our potential when we become our unique selves by paradoxically realising our oneness, and knowing ourselves to be part of the Divine. When we lose our idea of separation, we become our greatness. It is then we can channel our Soul’s Divinity, instead of living from the fearful separate ego identity.
Intelligent Design
There is amazing Intelligence and intrinsic design in all of Existence, including you and I. We are the miracle!
You are so much more than you what you think you are!
Nearly 14 billion years of the evolutionary process of the Universe have led to you. Some of the atoms in your body are practically that old. You are an inseparable part of this universal process and a leading edge of evolutionary technology (on this planet at least!).
This design does not stop at your creation, but extends to how reality is continuing to unfold for you and through you. There is harmony and balance in the Universe, with its in-built laws and the way things work. We can go with them, or against them and that determines whether we live in heaven or hell, both of which are accessible (in the words of Fat Boy Slim) right here, right now!
You’d be crazy to go against the grain of life, but that’s how many of us live, and then we complain about it! We do that in our relationships, with our health, and what we choose to do with our lives.
We can go with our Divine Nature or against its current. When we go against it, we struggle and get sick, as when we fill our bodies and minds with unwholesome foods and thoughts.
Pushing against the Tide
It’s no wonder that when we are disconnected from these deeper levels of reality and ourselves, we feel that we’re not living the life that we’re supposed to, and everything seems a tremendous struggle. We’re left with the feeling that surely there is an easier way.
Maybe you have an inkling that there’s more of you to discover, and that you’re simply not tapping into your potential and all you can be.
Perhaps it feels like life is against you, and you’re fighting it. But what if there was a way to discover that, all along, life has been for you! It’s been trying to make you see and help you, holding up a mirror to you, but you just didn’t realise it.
Life is not against you, it is merely saying not this way, but this…
Or maybe you’re not so much pushing as adrift on the seas, not really knowing who you truly are and what you’re here for. You might feel like somehow your life doesn’t really fit the real you. The only problem is that you don’t quite know who that is.
This might be the moment to start looking little more deeply into that.
Flow with the Soul
When we tap into our the depths of our Being, we move from pushing against the tide, struggling hard to make things happen, to using the currents and the whispers of the wind to fill our sail. We begin to experience what life is like with the wind at our back, in Flow with our Soul.
True Flow is flowing with the Soul, not just a temporary state.
So you might ask, if this our essence and birthright, why do we not experience this already.
Frankly one answer is, we are scared of letting go of the ego identity we have created for ourselves.
It’s scared of many things… losing control, our worst fears coming true and of the unknown.
We have stereotyped ourselves through our bodies, emotions and thinking, into a limited self.
Be Yourself
Although we seek many things in our lives, one of the greatest satisfactions is to truly be yourself. This is a more challenging feat than we imagine. Since we are influenced by so much noise from the outside, that clouds our judgment and crowds out our true selves.
We tend to dedicate so much attention outside of ourselves, but I think it is also by truly being ourselves, we can have what we seek externally.
So, how can we return to ourselves?
Are we going back to an original state, a sort of blueprint, or are we becoming, emerging into a possibility that does not yet exist, but which stands of the shoulders of what’s come before?
I believe we are like a new chapter in a book, it’s a continuation of what’s gone on before, but given that, there is a level of freedom to develop the plot as we choose. The more awareness we have the more freedom to choose what happens next!
To do this, we need to realise how we are writing and experiencing the story at the same time, and the mechanisms by which we do that.
Ego Soul or Source
Who do you think you are? And can you trust what you think?
We can have different identities depending on how we look at things. Are we a soup of particles, animal, human, consciousness witnessing existence, the Universe and/or God?
We have what I call a spectrum of identity. It ranges in the expression of Unity to separation.
On one level we ARE the Universe, the one process unfolding, since the is no separation or boundary in the process. All of creation is part of a greater whole. This oneness implies that you are God. So am I.
You are a distillation of essence, like a drop of the ocean. A drop, but always ocean.
Since you are undeniably part of Existence, you are an extension of the Source of all that is. If there is innate beauty and goodness in existence, then you have access to the intelligence, power and wisdom that you are part of.
Shallow View of the Personality
We have somehow forgotten this fact, and on the other end of the spectrum is the belief that you are just a physical being, completely separate from me. The personality of the ego is what holds this belief in separation. It says you’re separate to nature, to others and the rest of reality. It is trapped in this belief and is threatened by annihilation.
The personality has a shallow view of who you are, and with its separation from the whole come many negative expressions.
We are Divine, whether we know it or not, but the more we are aware it, the more we can bring forth our unique expression of the whole.
In between, these two ends of the spectrum is a view of ourselves which incorporates our unity and separateness. It knows our divinity and our humanness, our eternity and finiteness. It is our Soul, otherwise known as Higher Self.
The Higher Self holds the continuity of your story beyond this one human experience. It is about meaning and is enduring.
The Soul permits you to experience polarity and contrast while aware of Unity. It knows your history and allows you to grow and mature through experience.
Even in this physical finite realm, this eternal part of you is accessible. And it is in fact, the key to living the life you came live, one that is powerful and fulfilling.
Why are we here?
Really, I believe we come to play in this realm for a reason. We have our collective spiritual purpose and also our individual part in that.
What I mean by purpose is, what we’re up to. So, what we’re up to individually in our lives and what Existence is up to!
I sense our collective spiritual purpose is to realise our Oneness, to embody and experience the Unity and so the Love, behind reality and our power to create, which you could call God.
We are Waking up to Oneness or Unity, and through that realising Love.
This to me is what it seems the Universe is up to. It is the “one song” that is starting to sing together. If you wish to explore this idea further, Tim Freke, propose a wonderful perspective of this in his book, Soul Story.
As for our individual part in this, well, each one of us is experiencing and expressing a different facet of the Oneness.
By connecting to our Soul, we can discover our role in this grand play.
Dance with the Divine
You can dance with the devil or you can dance with the Divine.
Dancing with the devil is to be stuck in a reality where you are separate yourself from your outer experience, unconscious of how you’re creating it. Operating from the ego identity, in separation, we struggle against ourselves, nature and each other. It is living the nightmare.
Dancing with God is knowing our Unity with Existence, seeing how we’re in this Divine Flow and how we’re creating with our consciousness. When we tap into that we have access to the source of the Imagination and Creativity that made you, me and the whole marvellous Universe.
We can begin to write the script from our Higher Selves and not just play out the part we unconsciously wrote for ourselves in an endless loop.
Paradigm Shift
Living in Flow is a paradigm shift, which I can only describe as moving from one dimension to another, such as from being 3-dimensional to suddenly realising you’ve been a 4 or 5 dimensional Being all along! We find that there is so much more to life than what it seemed on the surface.
In the process, we discover that each one of us is a unique expression of Divine Nature, like a beautiful flower, with our own individual perfume and expression, and we can allow that flower to blossom.
We can start by becoming aware of our particular Divine Essence with qualities such as love, compassion, creativity, wisdom, joy, patience, gratitude and inner peace. Perhaps they are unpolished, but they are there.
As we recognise our own inherent divinity and that of others, it leads us to profound inner transformation, greater self-love, and improved mental and emotional well-being.
Beholding ourselves in this light, we can clear the channel to our Divine Expression. Our work more than anything else is to make manifest this heavenly Self here on earth.
As we do this, our lives become extraordinary, and we get the biggest gift which is beyond all material possession which is to be our true selves.
We are the leading edge of creation, creating with our every thought, word and deed.
Flowing with our True Nature
Becoming more Present to Life, and what is unfolding, we are able to respond in each moment with the wisdom of the our Higher Self. Having a meditative and mindful approach to all we do helps expand this Flow.
We start to experience magic in all of our lives, experiencing serendipity and synchronicities on a regular basis.
This is true Flow, not a specific state when certain external conditions are met. It’s not about what’s happening on the outside. It doesn’t have to be limited to specific scenarios or activities, but rather what’s going on within and where we’re operating from.
Flow is in fact, a dissolving or transparency of the ego. It is Presence. As we become empty of ego and its limited ideas, flow expands. In the process, we discover who we truly are.
Another way we can increase flow to more areas of our lives, is to notice the kinds of activities that bring us to this present moment awareness, without the noisy chatter of the ego in the mind. Make a point of spending more time there. It might be singing, dancing, running or even washing the dishes.
Notice what goes on within.
What’s there? What isn’t?
In these moments of flow, you’ll quite likely receive insight and inspiration for your life, including about how to live more in Flow.
When we align to our Higher Self or Soul, we experience Flow. And often when we are in Flow, our Higher Self speak to us and through us. They are intimately connected.
In this way, finding Flow, leads us to enhanced creativity, innovation and productivity, aligning us with our Soul’s purpose, with the effect of leading us, back to true selves, and to a more meaningful and fulfilling life.
Getting in Flow, leads us to ourselves and more Flow.
Making room for Soul
What people call Intuition is an expression of Soul in us. It is a way it speaks. I’m using ‘speaks’ but it can communicate in many ways: through a physical sensation, a feeling, a thought, or an image etc.
The important thing is that we create the space to ‘hear’ its ‘voice’.
So, what do we need to do to ‘listen’.
In one way, it’s quite simple, we just need to listen! Can you imagine in a conversation with someone, where you are speaking all the time, and are very opinionated. You leave no space for the other to speak and even when you are quiet, you’re busy in your mind all the time, ready with your response, and your fixed view. That would probably mean that you don’t really hear what they are saying.
This is what we do with our Soul. We leave no space for it to communicate with us.
Making room to listen is a start, to the ways in which you can develop your Intuition.
Clearing the Channel
We have stereotyped ourselves through our bodies, emotions and thoughts, into a limited self, with fixed ways of being, feeling and thinking. This reduces our creativity and options in the face of life.
If we want to live a soul-led life, then we must work to clear the channel to our Divinity. In fact, it might be the only thing you need to do to live an extraordinarily creative life!
It can be approached in a number of ways, but briefly, just as with any other block, it can only reside in our consciousness and expresses through the way our bodies, emotions and minds are.
We might choose to work physically with the body, releasing tensions, relaxing the nervous system and dealing with structural issues, for example, using physical therapies such as massage or yoga.
Another possibility is to reconnect with our emotions, to begin to feel any emotions that we’ve repressed or suppressed. Our relationships can be a great arena in which can see and work through our blocks. We can could begin to release stuck emotions, for example through psychotherapy, or even some form of creative expression.
Finally, we can work with the mind, noticing its content, the stories we tell ourselves, becoming aware of limiting beliefs that we hold, and allowing it to settle and heal, for example through meditation and mindfulness.
All three are obviously interrelated, and we can begin to clear the channel to our Higher Self via any of these routes.
Divine Vision
The key is to set the intention to connect with your Higher Self. Find ways that work for you in practice.
Start to see yourself as this Divine Being. Hold yourself in this light. Notice and reflect on all your beautiful qualities and gifts, as expressions of the Divine, that you embody.
For example, it could be through prayer, meditation, giving space and time to be in nature, or engaging in activities that you love, which get you into Flow.
You might use journaling prompts, guided meditations, and visualisation exercises, designed to help you connect with your inner Divine Nature.
A Journey of Discovery
This can be lifetime’s work, but never effort that is wasted. In embarking on this journey to uncover your True Self, you take the first step towards a profound and enriching adventure. Each moment spent in reflection and exploration brings you closer to understanding the depths of your Being.
The questions that I posed at the beginning are not merely existential musings, but invitations to look into the core of your existence.
The answers to these questions are not fixed but ever-evolving, much like the Universe itself. As you peel back the layers, you may find that who you thought you were is only a fraction of your True Essence.
Acknowledge that you are part of a greater whole, intrinsically connected to the universe’s Intelligence and design. By recognising the divine spark within you this guiding light, starts illuminating the path to your highest potential and a life of harmony, creativity, and fulfilment.
Let curiosity be your compass. Approach this journey with an open heart and mind, eager to discover the wonders within. Embrace the challenges as opportunities for growth, and allow your inner knowing to guide you through. As you become more present to life and attuned to your Higher Self, you will experience the Flow that transcends temporary states—Flow that is a reflection of living your Soul’s True Nature.
Your Part
In this sacred dance with the divine, you are not just a passive participant but an active creator. Your thoughts, words, and actions shape your reality. By aligning these with your Soul, you bring forth your unique expression of the Divine.
This journey is not about reaching a final destination, but about continuously unfolding into the magnificent Being you are meant to be.
Your journey is a gift to the world, and in the process, you will discover that the greatest fulfilment lies in being authentically and gloriously you.
If you are find yourself to be struggling on this path back to you really are, feel free to reach out for help by booking an initial consultation call. We can work together to find out where you might be blocked, and how you can begin to be yourself, by reconnecting to your Inner Being and Guide.
Photo by Shlomo Shalev on Unsplash
